"I won't mind if Modi becomes the next PM".

"I won't mind if Modi becomes the next PM".
The whole room turned towards me with such aghast faces as if I've announced that I'm having an extra marital affair six months in my marriage( I'm sure even then the faces would have retained some color). "What?". "Why?"
As the aftershocks of this siesmic statement became milder, inquestive eyes bored at me. They all wanted an answer & they wanted it quickly( I could hear KBC's miss tictiki in the background).
Why the hell did I say that.
" Don't you rember what he did to your people in Gujrat?".
" You want him in Delhi?".
" Will you not feel unsafe, insecure?".
Not letting a person speak while constantly demanding answers is a parlimentary trait, (watch Lok Sabha TVfor further validitation) which suddenly seemed to have infected some well meaning journalists.
"Chup rahiya aap sab. Desh ka musalman ab samajh raha hai ki uski bhalai kahan par hai." The well meaning gentelman chided everybody & looked towards me with benovalent eyes full of compassion. The startched saffron kurta he was wearing, his favorite colour, made him look larger. He came towards me , patted me on my back.
"Tum jaise pade likhe musalmano ko hi pahel karni padegi."
I smiled back as my thoughts went to the nightmare of the night before.

The Day before:Modi's Wikileaks were on TV as we sat for a light dinner( Kofte, Kheer, Khamiri roti, light?) . My father was paying more attention to what was being served on his plate then on Modi.( Modi- Kofte. No brainer). Eating quitely has never been my dad's virtue so after talking about the texture & aroma of kofta, the coversation veered to the 'disha & dasha' of politics.
"Ye amrika kyu iski itni tareef kar raha hai". I remained silent( as usual ).
"Waise PM ban bhi jaye to kya hai. Theek hi rehega. Rahul se to accha hi hai"
Kheer edged out both Modi & Rahul as my Dad paid no further attention to wikileaks.

As I setteled down to sleep I could feel the gravy working its way back towards the wrong way( I am a glutton & some day I'll pay for it). Many glasses of water later , I could feel my eyelids drooping. Suddenly I was in a room filled with people.

The dream Cast:
Sonia- wearing her usual sari & deadpan expression
Mulayam- in white dhoti kurta & skull cap
Mayawati- pastel color suit & sullen expression
Laloo- One size bigger kurta pajama with more hair sticking out of his ears then on his head



The Dream:
Sonia- Bhaiyo aur behno..
Laloo- Soniya ji, bhashan mat dijiye. Aur waise bhi apke bhashan sunne se to accha hai ki mein himesh reshamiya ko sun lo.
Mayawati- Jaldi bataiye, hume kyu bulaya hai. Mujhe ek aur ambedkar park ka udghatan karne jana hai( all the while she was admiring her new sandals)
Mulayam- Haan, mujhe bhi kaam hai...( To show how busy he is, he took out the phone gifted by kalyan singh, then suddenly realized his folly & kept it back in his pocket, making a mental note of never taking ot out in front of Azam Khan)
Everyone looked at Mulayam...
Mulayam- Acha theek hai, koi kaam nahi hai. Ab bolo
Sonia- Dekhiye election aane wala hai. Hame apne vote bank ki chinta karni chahiye. 5 saal mein unko nahi pucha, ab to pucha padega.( She said this while looking at a turbaned man who was asking for some permisssion)
Mulayam- Maine to pucha tha, Saifai mein Iftaar party bhi di thi.
Laloo- Sirf, Iftaar party se kaam chalta to aaj Paswan desh ka pradhan mantri hota.
Sonia- Sahi baat, Hume unke liye kuch to karna hoga. Hamari party to pichle 60 saalo se unke liye kitna kuch kar rahi hai.
Mayawati- Jaldi bolo , kya karna hai, mujhe naye sandal khareedne jana hai.
Sonia- Maine ek aadmi ko bulaya hai. Aata hi hoga. Wo garuntee se hume jita sakta hai.
Suddenly, a man with crimson red hands , enters the room. He looks all around him & then starts glaring at Mulayam. Seeing him in so much rage, Mulayam becomes fidgedity & wipes his head, taking his skull cap off. The man's expression suddely changes & he starts smiling.
Mulayam- Puff... Pehle kyu nahi bataya ki apne ese bulaya hai. Mein topi to hata leta. Aaj to baal baal bacha hoon.
Sonia- Is election mein ye un logo ko darayge aur jab wo dar kar chillayenge to hum unko sambhal lenge. Vote pakka, sarkar hamari. Bas na school ki zaroorat aur na naukri dene ki. Arre, abki baar to unke kisi candidate ko ticket dene ki bhi zaroorat nahi padegi. Ye itna darawna hai ki wo apne aap dode chale aayenge.

General handshakes all around with Mayawati carefully avoiding Mulayam & vice versa. Suddenly, things go haywire & there is pandemonium all around.

I get up to find myself all sweaty. A sachet of Eno sent the kofta back to their place but the dream lingered on. Is modi such a bad thing after all. I had made up my mind.

Next day in the office, I dropped the bomb.

"I won't mind if Modi becomes the next PM".